From Worse To Better

Sometimes it just has to get worse before it gets better.
Our plan was simply to paint the room, but because someone before us didn't do this properly it was a disaster.

Although I like challenges that was just huge waste of time, money as well as some mental health LOL We ended up with five people in three bedrooms, and 2-3 weeks delay, in a very rainy weather that also wasn't helping.

What not to do when removing paint inside the house?
Do not use chemicals. Until you really have to.
I also mean 'green' products, which are in fact so delicate, sometimes too delicate to work!

Harmful chemicals are obviously danger for you (lungs, skin, eyes) but not better at all when it comes to the walls!!!

Two bottles (half of a gallon) @ around $15 + HST and damage you have to repair. No, thank you.

What to do when the paint is not staying in place to be solid base for your new color?

Same you would do with any other surface; use the sand paper.
What stays, will stay, and what is gone is gone. At the same time you'll smooth the surface, so there will be even layer of paint left, with no patches with sharp edges that could cause shadows on your beautiful new color.
For next 2-3 weeks we were scratching and scrubbing, then drying the walls, then repairing the damage with compound then the primer, so the color will be evenly saturated.
Drying was really hard, because of rainy weather, no luck at all LOL but at the end it was worth every hour we've fighting.

Not that I did much if anything at all ;-) After chemo you won't tolerate the smell of any chemicals.
At the end, my little one's room in nautical style will be in blue and cream with red accents and white furniture.
The cream I chose is so beautiful, that on the worse, rainy, grey November day it still looks bright and happily sunny.
There are new challenges with the decor and organization as little one was diagnosed with allergy, but what are the dust mites in the face of cancer ;-) I'm ready. OK, almost ;-)

Oh, my diagnosis...
The bump on my head is 'nothing'. I wasn't able, emotionally, to go to details, to find out what that was exactly. Tumor is responding to treatment (yes, some may be clinically resistant) , what they can still see on the pictures are dead cancer cells.
Performing manual exam my oncologist was almost dancing and practically screaming from excitement.
After 4 cycles of doxorubicin (so called red devil) and cyclophosphamide it is hard to find.
Way to go! For everyone who needs that, I wish the same!

Half-Way Through

They will send you to check, if it's shrinking. It could be clinically resistant after all....

My surgeon, I really trust: "So... why did the oncologist send you to me?"

Me: "???"

My surgeon: "I'll try to call her to find out."

Well, I'm in such uncomfortable situation I'm appreciating not making this worse. I just wonna to be regular patient not requiring any special treatment, please.

One little monkey jumping on the bed

She fell off and bumped her head

Momma called the doctor, and the doctor said

Careful, this monkey might soon be death. 

They had the mri report, that was saying IT is not shrinking, but is no longer in the muscles.

The other thing; they sent me right away to scan and assess the bump on my head.

Everyone was asking when I noticed.

Well ;-) for sure it wasn't there when I had my hair! I don't recall anything that could help me to be more specific.

Now, I will be waiting until Monday for diagnosis.

Other than that: rush here, rush there, everywhere rush, rush!

This chemo has fatal impact on the largest organ: skin.

Combined with alcohol, they like to use to keep everything sterile, it's a disaster.

The four letter word: diet!

I promised to share the experience. Finally I'm back. Hopefully tomorrow won't be agonizing again and I could write more. I guess I'm doing more around the house rather than writing. Good for me ;-)

Between 2nd and 3rd chemo I've seen dietitian.
It appeared I'm doing everything by the book with no book. Instinct I guess.
There it is then, for someone who is looking its way in this tasteless hell. Although I may be not the best example as I wasn't vomiting even once.

It's good to drink and eat, as it's kind of pushing nausea down, back to the stomach.
Small meals, up to 6 a day, eat slowly, do not eat at drink at the same time, avoid odors (big no-no for fish and broccoli!) as well as rich flavor, fatty and spicy food. Dishes with cooked tomatoes are inedible.
To make the story short after chemo you fill like there is toxic waste in your mouth and eating something spicy may bring that taste back even 3 weeks after chemo!
Good news is: the first chemo is usually the worse one. With every next cycle you can try new things.

What worked for me, and what the dietitians recommend:

• Rusks (with jam or plain), white bread called French or Belgian, raisin bread toasts, nesquick cereal they also recommend soda crackers, dry plain cookies
• Cooked ham (for avoiding strong taste 1/2 ham vacuum packed boiled in water for 15min, remove the foil and leave in the pot to cool down), cottage cheese, feta, yogurt and add from dietitian cheese, deli meats and eggs
• Mashed potatoes (eureka!) they say also rice and pasta
• Pear nectar, water with honey, milk to drink
• Veggies were funny and long list: tomatoes and radishes. Only raw and only two.
• Fruits; I said 'apple' she asked 'pineapple?' Pineapple is really good, juicy, helping with the taste.

If you have mouth sores (happily not me) lukewarm water with raw honey should help. They recommend soda water witch is not working well with my stomach.

What is important: you have to get enough proteins: 75g per day.
I was eating skim milk powder! Witch I like. 4g per 2 tbsp. Better is only, and I was surprised, peanut butter 4g per 1 tbsp. For the same amount you would have to have 1/2 cup of pudding, yogurt, milk or soy milk.
Other products:
7g proteins you'll find in 1/4 cup of nuts or cottage cheese, 1/3 cup of tofu, 2 tbsp cream cheese, 1/2 cup of dried beans (wonder who would have that one!) or 30g of meat.
6g of proteins is whole egg. I couldn't even look at them for the first month!

Today I'm after my 4th chemo. Yes! I'm half way through!
On the third day after I was able to have regular dinner: mashed potatoes (that is super food after chemo!) with asparagus and sunny side up eggs. No pictures. Everything gone in seconds.
In a meantime I had what I call plebeian pizza, and this I'll show. I expect it to be eastern European invention.

Baked sandwiches or plebeian pizza

bread
butter
cold cuts: ham or sausage (lean, good, smoked, European style sausage)
cheese
veggies: tomatoes, onion, but also pepper or dill pickles are nice option

Spread butter over the bread. It has better consistency when baked.
Put some meat, then cheese, and veggies on top. Not too much.
Bake 10-15min @ 160 C.

No cheese will also do. My boys are allergic to dairy products I'm using margarine.
You can make them fancy adding different cheese. Blue or camembert like. Try figs or pears. Different breads... endless possibilities. Perfect for winter.

One day at the time

That's what we agreed to with one of the nurses. It appears, you can not predict chemo side effects.
But you can still survive ;-)
This time it was about pain again. Not so excruciating like after 1st chemo, but more prolong.
Yes, it follows the pattern: 1st day so-so although chemo itself didn't go smoothly. Maybe the body is weaker, maybe they tried to give it too fast. Everyone wants to go home on Friday ;-)
You can still eat and move around. The wellbeing, or it's leftover, goes down the drain around 3hours after neulasta shot.
The 4th day is agonizing, and after all pains and aches strike.
Every muscle in the body hurt to the point you can't sit or lie down. The princess and the pea under the mattress LOL
The headaches, bad back pain, arthritic palms and feet, sinuses and stomach. Enough for few people. Even with one side effect still missing: the mouth sores.
It is very interesting...
Once I said 'scoliosis', that on regular basis I can deal with exercising and swimming, and they ordered additional scan to find bone cancer. I said 'arthritis palms' they look for the cancer.
Come on, people! It's not the only disease on the planet. Try to treat patient as one piece.
Remember? You are giving me neulasta. 35% of patients complain for back pain and bone pain as side effect. I'm not different, just because of my condition I may experience it more painful, but it doesn't necessarily means of cancer.
I'm really lucky. My cancer is slow. As for today they didn't even see it spread to the nodes. Although we will know the true after surgery and biopsy.

On the 8th day someone open the door to the store when I was buying gas.
And I had to have it! Tim Hortons half-and-half. I hope more chocolate in coffee means less caffeine. 
What a beautiful day. Day 8 and 9... until winter I guess ;-) or rather next chemo LOL

Fall in Ottawa

Perfect day for feeding ducks.
So exciting!

October is Breast Cancer Month

It struck me how little I knew about breast cancer, symptoms, awareness. Anything!
I'm pretty sure, the pink ribbons where not there on the mushrooms packaging foil last year. But still I was like blind in the darkness. Not that the light would matter ;-)

Anyway, right now everyone is talking about breast cancer. I'll be happy to talk or rather write too. But really I wish they would talk a lot about all symptoms in high school.
Starting October 1st on the news, through The View, The Talk, Ellen's show, Marilyn's, Dr. Oz, and those I understand: woman to woman or professional talk. But I've seen the subject even at Anderson Cooper's.
The mushrooms, romaine hearts, yogurt, milk... you name it. And I love it!
What I love the most is dancing for cancer research. This is what I'd like you to see.
It started with McGill University, which I've seen on news. The sponsor is paying (donating, you name it ;-)) to research for every view of the video.
There is a dance competition. The winner will donate $10,000 to the charity of their choice.
The contestants
Please, watch, choose, and write your lovely comment what you like about the idea.

Waiting is pair of pink earrings. Silver and 4mm Swarovski bicone beads in fuchsia, some beading wire to connect.

I wish to mail them to the winner in 2-3 weeks, before my forth chemo. 

Being Grateful

That was my favorite holiday last Monday; Thanksgiving Day.
The weather was better than perfect! I even have half naked dude on the pictures, but not even close to handsome to show the world LOL
My husband is always making perfect turkey. I was able to bake my pear and cranberries crumble! Good food and friends. Guess last holiday until next summer.

Ottawa, Mooney's Bay and perfect weather.

Today I'm even more thankful as I realized it is Wednesday. I just found one more day before third chemo! That's what I need the most; time. I'm so slow! And have to rest most of the time. Crazy!

There will be first giveaway on my blog. Possibly, last before I'm well again.
If you want pink earrings watch me ;-)
It won't be so free, I'll ask you watch something and have opinion.
The detailed information will be posted really soon. It has to be before next chemo, which is on Friday. And I have to make the earrings!

I'd like also to write about wigs (until I remember ;-)) dietician and diet and last: never ending story which is my picc line. It actually can end. My oncologist gave up, the nurses picc team is thinking if they still may have solution. The wound nurse didn't see me yet, so maybe there is a chance. And there is something I'd like to bake... I need more time or energy. One will do ;-)

Giveaway contest starts Thursday around 2pm EDT.

Einstein needed

or going to school.

Little one is getting ready with mom
11:15 there is lunch on the table. We chat while he is eating and I prepare his snack for school.
When he is done, he goes to the bathroom, and I prepare his clothes.
Yes, usually I let him stay in his pajamas for 1,5-2 hours. This way I'm sure his clothes will stay clean. No jam sandwiches flying down ;-)
If he is in good mood he will have 10-15 minutes left to talk about school (and yes! After mom he is talkative!)  or play a little bit more. It can even be computer.



Waiting ready for the school bus


Little one is getting ready with Dad
11:40 Dad appears with fear in his eyes.
Cereal is served, but with no time there is no chatting rule. Then Dad is seating and feeding a baby to be sure there is no chatting and they can make it.
They run to the bathroom where Dad is brushing baby's teeth and the bedroom, where Dad can dress the baby.
Now it's about 3 min left before school bus comes.
- Dad, I'd like to take that blue car to school.
- What blue car?
I look with my eyes wide open at Dad kneeling down and pulling the box with hundred fifty eight cars. Of course, there is no toys policy at school.
- No, not this one. The ooother one. One of favorite games, I have to agree.
- I said blue.
- And...
There is no 'and' or 'end'.
I scream.
Not for ice cream.
Dad stands up straight and rushes to the door.
I assume, he knew what was the scream about. Even had no time to be specific LOL

Slowly we are getting back on track.

Set your goals...

low.
I mean really the lowest of the low.
Then you'll still have a chance for achievements! ;-)
Only two weeks left to the next chemo, and I'm crap.
Interesting how I change my mind depending on my well-being.
Why do they call this well-being anyway?
When I feel better I wanna to quit! Not to go through this again.

Today I decided I want to see 50/50. Think Monday around noon should be the best attendance for me. Too bad they don't open at 8 a.m. on Mondays.
Then I thought I'd rather own the dvd. But it'll take time that's why I should go to the movies.
Here it is: decision made. I'm going to the movies to see 50/50! Hurray!

And I didn't go.
Not because finally I was afraid I won't be able to... behave. Yes, I could very easily make a fool of myself.
That reminds me.

In Polish we have different idiom for that situation. We say 'make a circus'. Because it can be entertaining.
Few years back I had a conversation with my older one, who was then the little one and I was pregnant with the factual little one.
I was getting ready to drop the older little one to daycare and crazy fast drive to work. He was standing in a bathroom watching me putting on make up, and I was looking even better than I was feeling that day.
- Hi honey. Do you like mom's look?
- ekhm... You look like a clown.
My jaw dropped.
- Is that good or bad?
- Of course it's good. Now you can go to work in a circus!

Well, no any circus guarantied today.
I just simply had no energy for anything.
One hour until bed time left, that's my tonight dream.
But I'll see it!

today's achievements:
pizza for dinner, sure that was take out
but I was able to organize last week mail, and little one was ready for his picture day

First month gone. Two chemotherapy treatments. One day of school missed. And my husband is still alive after crazy, crazy week.
Next month we have more support.

50/50

I've got really excited seeing 50/50 trailer even have no idea what tv program was it LOL, but I thought I will run to the cinema on Friday!
The first minute I've seen the title I knew what's going on. My diagnosis! I'm having one foot in the grave. It's 50/50 for surviving the treatment.
Yesterday I've seen Seth Rogen being interviewed again. And now I don't know. Do I still want to see the movie?
To be accurate with my opinion I had to find it!
On etalk, Sept 28, time 10:48

Host: "...Seth Rogen's new film 50/50 may be about cancer, but that doesn't mean it won't make you laugh"
R: "We wanted to show, that even though something sad is happening there are a lot of funny stuff that happens also, and you can't ignore that side of it."

Seriously? Is it about sadness?
"Oh, honey. It's so sad your bunny felt into your oatmeal today. No, you can't sleep together. But it's just for tonight. "

It may be about fears, tears, anger and rage.
It can be about catching up, making everyday better, and planning for maybe non-existing future.
It can be about excruciating pain, loneliness, dependency and the border, where the dignity ends.
You can still laugh, make jokes and be crazy. But please, not the sadness. Why sadness?

Still alive after second chemotheraphy treatment

There it is:
My dear diary,

• Day 4: Now I remember! Forth day is the agony day. Nothing more or less. Nothing to add. Just breath, even it's hard. I'd like to write a little bit more, and I'm writing nothing. This is the day of fascinating ceilings again! 

-         Would you like something to drink?

-         No, thank you

-         Tv? Ya want me to connect the laptop?

-         Nope

-         What will you do?

Well, I’ll lie, look at the ceiling and breathe. Worse day. I remember after first chemo, I was lying on a bathroom floor wailing and my husband was shaving my hair... I didn't think I will ever like or need anything again.

• Day 5: Sleeping beauty day. You sleep, are falling asleep, or waiting to fall asleep.
• Day 6: Better day! More action LOL Showering, preparing food. And no pain this time! Even new dressing is finally working. Nurse asked me if I'd prefer to go to the clinic for change. Hello?? I'm not driving!!! For sure not for the next week!
• Day 7: Extreme challenge day. You have a meal and... rest. You walk downstairs and rest. But this is the day of making plans and small achievements. And the bread smells so good! I have to make one! Just as it was after first chemo. I should be able to walk to school bus on Saturday/Sunday. Too bad too late ;-) Next week then will be perfect!

Chemotherapy diary

yak!
They, the survivors (not me yet ;-)), are saying it's getting better. The first cycle is the worse one. I don't know!
What do I know? For sure I won't be cycle-path. I can't wait to live without the treatment! How tempting is the thought of quitting... But the truth: the second run is feeling easier. It's not what nurse suggested; that you know what to expect. I didn't expect any of that and I'm really happy the side effects are not so severe with just second run. Only... I don't know about tomorrow... scheduled pain day :-(

Dear diary,

• Day 1: Flu with muscle pain, chills and severe fatigue. Overnight (what night? 3 hours of sleep is not a night!) sweating that wakes you up and forces to change the pajamas.
• Day 2: Not bad, you can even eat with your family. Just remember about pills for pills or your stomach will kill you.
• Day 3: Disaster. Eat and drink all the time or your stomach will kill you, as you can not take more pills for pills :-( And if the stomach is forgivable then there is the nausea, and this lump in your throat that you can't swallow pill for nausea with. What a nonsense. Did I mention severe fatigue? No, it wasn't the first day. Walking down the stairs, upstairs, opening one closet, two drawers, and you'll fill like you've just run the marathon. That's the fatigue. And that's the 3rd day.
• Day 4: Hopefully will be better. Or I refuse to write about it! ;-)

As everything is getting much worse after neulasta injection I became suspicious. Am I in some clinical trial or something?
On day 4 the nurse is coming. Again. My skin forced them to come to change the dressing every second day now. It's not only me, who loves the PICC line. Now it's my skin too :-) and I believe still my medical oncologist favourite!

Turkey rice soup rocks! LOL

An Apple A Day

It supposed to be about last day, but turn out differently. You never know what life has to offer.
Then it's not about the last day before second chemo (hate it!). It's about fall and falling apples.
When I spotted small, inconspicuous apples I couldn't believe. But there they where. Even the French name is the same as in my first language: reinette grise!

Russet Apples

In the middle of winter, my grandpa used to go downstairs, into very cold basement, where he stored crates full of juicy, crunchy apples. Covered in blankets, crispy until the late spring.
Too bad it's not the best apple variety nowadays. Delicate in care, sensitive to frost and not very abundant they are almost gone.
It's not the only one defect of nowadays apples. They are on the infamous 'Dirty Dozen' list (I planned to write about one day), but with all the benefits it's better to have non-organic apple than not to have any. Just not only wash them, but also peel before enjoying this crispy, sweet fall symbol.
Definitely they are perfect as always for sharing and making friends :-)

My son won't let me die of hunger. He loves sharing.

Technically I'm prepared for second run.

Pills for side effects, pills for pills and pain killers with narcotics. How could I not hate it? In reality I'd love to go to hell or stay at home. Just not to have to go there. I only hope this time will be easier. Some say it is.

PS:

Still peeling! Not the apples. That would be too good. 

Peeling for appealing look

How long ago?
Yesterday, maybe two days ago I was laughing at Lucy's description of her house as "Seventies Monstrosity".
Well... I'm not laughing anymore. The only difference: our house is from sixties.
Right now it is a mess. We moved in boys together to master bedroom, so we could have separate bedrooms. But before we moved the furniture I said 'Why not to paint?' Especially because some of the old pain was peeling of.
Boys loved that fact, and were scratching the surface, pooling the pieces and hiding them under the bed.



Problem with peeling paint



So we are painting. We have the colors, and the tools.

Wait a minute. Not so fast! We should remove the old paint, or it will be falling together with the new one.

And it appeared to be a huuuuge problem.

Although it was almost falling down with no help, in other places it turned out it's been applied forever.

Tomorrow will be the last trial. If it's not working we better find new place LOL

It better work! As I'm still planning on living in decent place!

Pirates arrrr

The end of this summer finally feels like summer. Not that I'm complaining that I could breath for the last two months, and wasn't sweating like a pig.
I find it nice, when I'm able to cool my house just managing opening and closing windows, treating air condition as the last resource. We enjoy the weather.

Pirates, in pirates scarves

Mom, are you wearing your pirate hat? - the little one was watching me closely as I dressed.

Yes, I believe I'm wearing my pirate hat. - no option with home made haircut.

Can I wear mine, please?

So there we were, both wearing pirate 'hats' while playing with bubble swords.

Making bubbles

Yesterday I noticed I can pull my hair out easily. It's time to shave the 1cm that was left on my scalp, before it shows in every meal LOL
PS
There is something under my dressing :-( Not again!

9/11 cancer

I can't believe I almost forgot!
To be exact I was thinking 11th is on Monday and I still have time.
Guess everyone 10 and over can find its story.

Our flight from Europe to Toronto was scheduled for September 12.
That was the only one that was cancelled, and we were stuck for 2 weeks with all seven suitcases packed.
Just now I've seen that the Diverted movie about Gander 9/11 is on tv. And that struck me: we could land in Gander! Every September 11th flight had to. A town of 9,000 took in 7,000 passengers.
Why did they want to help?
And why the help for 9/11 heroes is not here?
Why we can remember the ones who were killed, even they don't need us anymore, but not the ones who stayed to fight for our future? Why are they worth nothing today?
Let the dead rest in peace, and alive live in peace.

Taste preferences or physiology of taste

Well...
It's not working! My taste buddies. I mean the taste buds are not my buddies anymore.
I don't like sweets! Terrible, as I hoped not to loose weight being on cheesecake (best American cake after brownies) diet.
Hearing from few doctors, that cancer likes sugar too I thought for a moment that maybe that's not the worse thing happening to me, but as an offset for the whole week I couldn't even think! about veggies without nausea. Then I say: draw LOL

Anyway, I'd like to thank Lucy for the courage to write every day. Nothing better than having good example.
Although don't expect that's gonna happen ;-) I know I won't stop now.

Meanwhile, I noticed that fall is coming fast this year, after cool summer. The smell of the backyard is not the same and sometimes you could miss even the heat.
But I always loved fall. With all the colors, and plentiness of heartwarming fruits and ... pumpkins!
That reminds me it's Italian plum season! I want some, and some more!
As well as for fairs, and festivals.
Tomorrow: Feast of Fields in my favourite Experimental Farm garden.

Fall at Experimental Farm, Ottawa 2010

Will see, maybe I could drive when the weather has still some mercy for us.

Perogies saved my life

I wish to know what the chemotherapy diet is. The one, that would help to cope with side effects.
But I can only share information about what I'm able to swallow. Perogies with meat. European type, with soft dough and mildly flavored filling. If I'm smart, I should order some with cooked turkey and no onion or pepper, because original ones are still too spicy!

I also had turkey soup with rice I can't even look at right now.

2 turkey tights
4-5 carrots
1 parsnip
piece of celeriac
1/2 cup of rice (short or medium grain)
salt

Normally, I would use bay leaf, allspice and fresh lovage, but the day before I couldn't eat grilled salmon because of spices then the soup had to be plain. brrr...
Just simmer everything for long time. The longer the better. 2-3 hours, until the meat is really soft. After two days with basically no food you will love that almost tasteless meat.

I prepared myself second batch yesterday, which I'll freeze for the next time. And, miraculously, today ta-dah! I was able to walk my little one to school bus.
Amazing, how children accept everything as normal. Mom with the scarf on her head (why not?), matching earrings, dressing on the arm and we are ready to go. Actually I feel lucky, as I found the back I lost while sitting on the curb. Still sounds like mission impossible LOL
More lucky, as yesterday was the pain day. And today, yesterday is gone.

Coincidental death sentence

come unsuspiciously from my husband.
'No.
No. No!' did I ever mention how, sometimes, I don't understand the simplest English? 'That's not gonna happen! You are not eating in bed!'
Oh! That's not gonna happen. Then as well I may be not eating at all! at some point.
And besides; what crumbs? I've never seen perogies crumbs...

I missed the school year beginning.
I even was thinking to pick up my older one from the school bus after the first day, but it was before I knew what time is it. It was noon only, and I felt rather like midnight so I went straight... to bed.

Last days I felt I'm dead, just no one found my body yet.
Now I know why it is about survivors, not fighters.
There is nothing to fight about. You just lie down until you are able to move again. Standby mode. Then one day start with your baby finger for training ;-) hallelujah!
After ressurection you know you are alive. Although the pain stays.

Hot air balloon festival

Not for us. Not this year.
If there is the next year, we will go to every possible festival, event in the neighborhood.
Talking about neighbors, she is in the hospital again. Third time this year. Zero immunity.

Hot air balloon festival, Ottawa 2009

First I've seen my shadow, and fast turned into the bathroom to check my new haircut.
Well... The medical oncologist seen before first time said 'You will want to cover it after second run' I can see now I have to cover it!
Talking to her we discussed my picc dressing problems as well as appointments that were booked on not right days for me. She asked 'Aren't you pulling your hair yet?'
'What's the point? Wouldn't they go on their own?'

My husband said 'The older one has exactly the same hair! Now you can tell why.'
Don't you worry, honey, Dad doesn't see well. You have very nice hair and quite good cut. Nothing to be afraid off before the first day of school. Mom's hair look like old fleece, and now, when it's short it's a disaster, but I wasn't able to wash them. Sooner or later they all will be gone anyway.
My advice: do this until you can. Before chemo, before picc line. To be comfortable for the last days you are still not bald.

Maybe I don't want to go there.
I realized I don't even know what my chances are.
Maybe it's not worth.
And the fact I have to many kids, that can't walk is not helping.
I always knew they are noisy. But this is misinterpretation in the little one case. The house is falling apart when he is in. No place to hide upstairs, no place to hide downstairs. Yoopi! Winter is coming!

PICC calendar



crabapples


"Crap apples! Crap apples!" I used to call whenever I see them. And then the older one would laugh so hard he staggers and can't speak. I had a chance to do it again :-)
There is a lot crab apples trees in Ottawa. I mean a lot! Beautifully covered with flowers in spring and heavy under the colorful fruits in fall. Last warm touches before long winter. Something I can smile today even with all the crap.
Hopefully to set everything right is so difficult and later routine will be much smoother.

And there is the calendar with all possibilities what may happen.

• Aug 26 morning, PICC procedure: reaction to transpore - latex-free, hypoallergenic, transparent and perforated (for breathing) plastic surgical tape. I get the piece of regular picc dressing  to test on my free arm.
• Aug 27 afternoon, change of hospital dressing for the one I was testing, as there were no reaction on left arm.
• Aug 28 evening, my arm is burning. This is the reaction to burn net dressing (what a coincidence!) the nurse generously gave to me; red rush.

• Aug 29 morning, I woke up with small open wound. They let me test the dressing, but not the orange edge with glue. Just the inside. Hurray!
• Aug 30 morning, Another blister. Obviously when I'm sleeping I'm not aware of protecting band slipping down and slightly rolling of the dressing. I had to use bandage to secure the plastic end as I had a feeling I'll tear out everything any minute.

my scab and blister

• Aug 31 noon, The nurses coordinator offered someone will come. I called to ask WHEN will someone come for the following visit, as it can't be the same day as chemo, and no one called me yet. No need to treat this as emergency as I was in the hospital anyway. They changed wounds causing dressing using a lot of gaze and paper tape, gave one more to try for future together with information that they still have more options left LOL  The nurse was using bare hands even everything else was sterile. She said she washed them, I answered not to worry, if she causes infection I'll be happy to go to remove the picc! LOL

It wasn't bad day. I was recognized by my surgeon, I'm not just a number, and also met nurse training all chemo and radiotherapy nurses in biggest Ottawa hospital. She advised me to ask for special cream to protect my skin. I've got information for fantastic ('ve seen the pictures) wigs at very, very good prices.
Not bad. Huh?
They also liked my DIY picc dressing protecting dressing :-) I made using 100% cotton sock.
I'll share the information, but now I'm already sleeping.